Saturday, March 14, 2009

Saturn's Return

Recently I was telling a friend that Joshua and I were celebrating our fourth anniversary of dating this month and that next month I would be celebrating my 30th birthday. She said something to the effect of "that's okay that you didn't meet your husband earlier in your life." I was shocked because I feel like "Okay? It's GREAT!"

Now, I don't mean to imply that I feel anything less than complete adoration for my husband. However, I am so grateful for all those years I had on my own before I met him. I had time to explore my own interests and the world. Since I seem to be at the end of my Saturn's return, I seem to spend a good deal of my down-time reflecting on my life. Let's reflect together!

My second semester of college I realized that I loved being on the water -- sailing and (for a very brief time) as the coxswain on a crew boat. It is amazing to think that it was my friend Julia's mention of sailing being "very cold" and "pretty uncomfortable" that sparked my interest in the sport. This interest had gone on to affect my life in so many exciting and positive ways. I can easily say that without sailing in college, I would have lead a very different life. And crew, while interesting, wasn't a life-long passion. It may have been due to the fact that it was merely my ability to wake up early that allowed me to be a coxswain. It was definitely my lack of ability to steer straight that eventually caused them to not ask me back for a second semester. I take pride in my complete ineptitude as a coxswain. That's tough to mess up.

(Sailing: Baltimore Harbor with Joellen, Crew: Loyola boathouse with Matt, Roger, Tim and Jon)

During my junior year of college, I studied abroad in Thailand for six month. I had the opportunity to spend large chunks of time in temples practicing mindful meditation, which were very special times for me. I also spent a lot of time going clubbing with some Thai girls who declared me their "best friend" during my first day of classes. Due to their dedication to my education (i.e. drilling me with Thai vocabulary during lunch) and their interest in increasing their own popularity by having an international friend on their arm all the time, I learned the Thai language and gained a wonderful insight into city-dwelling non-traditional college-aged Thai women. Moreover, during those six months I was also able to spend a few weeks traveling the length of China, a few weeks scuba diving in Southern Thailand and weekends in Malaysia and Cambodia.

(Bangkok, Thailand with P'Aur, P'Ann, Nong Nue and P'Aur's latest boyfriend in P'Aur's bedroom)

When I got back to America, I realized that I had seen more of Asia than America. To remedy this situation, I bought a train ticket to travel from Baltimore to Los Angeles so that I could visit Erica at her college. Sure, I did not pay the extra money for a sleeper seat for the four-day trip and I missed my train during a layover in Chicago. But these elements made it possible for me to meet this bunch of ladies who also missed the train in Chicago. (Amtrak flew us to catch up with our plane.) I still try to keep in touch with Marg (on the right) and her husband Herb (taking the photo). I have to admit that I was a little underwhelmed by most of the country -- it was simply big and flat. A few years later, while driving cross-country by myself, I reconfirmed that suspicion.

During this trip to L.A., I was able to jump in the Atlantic Ocean for the first time. It still blows my mind that Erica and I have been friends since kindergarten. This was only one of many trips we took to visit each other over the years -- Utah, Baltimore, L.A., St. Louis, Carlisle, Seattle, and almost in Honduras.

In college, I was able to volunteer with Beans&Bread Meal Program and the Fredrick Ozanam House (FOH) in Baltimore. Going to B&B started out as a way to get some time on my own -- I would borrow a car from the college every Tuesday morning before my physics labs in order to go down to the meal program and serve with a bunch of retired folks. I did this for three school years because it brought me so much joy. Once we became friends, I had a standing "date" with two patrons of the meal program: an elderly gentleman with a great southern drawl named Bernard and a heroin addict named Laura. They became the people I looked to for support and encouragement.

I was able to spend my freshman spring break in Kentucky painting a school and eventually lead the Spring Break Outreach trip within Baltimore during my senior year. As a part-time job during my senior year of college, I was a Center for Values and Service's Volunteer Organizer for Beans&Bread and FOH. Below is a picture of a car wash that I helped to arrange for FOH. Fredrick Ozanam House was a transitional housing program for men going from prison or homeless back into community life. Even though I did not work with these men directly as much as I would have liked, they are the reason why I'm currently in graduate school studying issues of reintegration.

After graduating, I spent a summer working at Getaway Sailing in Baltimore. I taught sailing and was the mate during the week-long sailing camps. I lived in a racially diverse neighborhood which was very eye opening for me.  This was easily one of my favorite summers.

After college, I worked at JPMorgan Chase, which is where I had interned the summer between my junior and senior years of college.  While I rented an apartment with a co-worker in Newark, DE, I usually commuted up to the NYC Chase building in downtown Manhattan.  While I enjoyed the work at times, I often didn't like the mindset of many of my coworkers.  I spent every Wednesday night driving down to Annapolis to race Snipes with a former America's Cup crew member or to Havre d'Grace to race Star boats.  On the weekends, I'd go down to Baltimore to see my boyfriend at the time and sail with him as much as I could.  Eventually, when work got so busy, I tried racing Thistles on the Delaware river, close to my apartment.  It was just a race of drifting -- totally depressing like my time in Delaware.  I even got a job at an Italian restaurant which was part of a Holiday Inn to have interactions with people who weren't JPMorgan employees and to learn how to waitress in case I ever needed to know (always thinking ahead!).   Tellingly, I have no pictures from this 1.5 year time in my life. 

My boyfriend at the time told me about a boat named Wireless which was staying at the marina on Gibson Island, MD, a private island, and how they were looking for a chef.  One weekend I arranged to try out to work on the boat.  It was a disaster which I'll get into another day.  In the end, I was hired as the chef, but always referred to there-after as the cook because I only served very simple meals.  Below is my mate, Mark with the suckling pig who lived in the freezer and a picture of the view from our boat looking into Redhook, St Thomas USVI where we stayed for six months.  If you look carefully, you can see a turtle in the water.



After a year of the craziness of Caribbean boat life, I decided to drive to Seattle, sight-unseen because I heard it was nice.  I applied for and was awarded an AmeriCorpsVISTA position at the Refugee Resettlement Office.  I had two months before my position began; instead of hanging out on the East Coast, I spent the time going cross country slowly and seeing the sights.  Usually I'd drive for a day or two and then spend 4-5 days backpacking in a National Park or Forest.  I only spent one night in a hotel -- in Vegas -- because there weren't any campgrounds in the area as cheap or as seemingly as safe as a hotel.  I loved this trip and still daydream about it often.  So much time spent in the woods by myself was perfect for me.  Here I am in the bottom of the Grant Canyon behind Ribbon Falls.  I spent the longest chunks of time in Rocky Mountain National Park and Zion.


About a month and a half into my trip, while in Oregon and having a difficult time finding a quiet, safe place to camp, I decided to volunteer at a Catholic Worker house.   I had read about them during college while reading Dorothy Day and had always wanted to spend some time in one.  I went to a library, did some research and found that there was one in Eugene, Oregon for women and children, St John Bosco House.  I contacted them and they welcomed me to come volunteer there.  Originally, they suggested that I live with the women and children before I moved into the volunteer housing.  I didn't think anything of it; but it was a few weeks later that the volunteer coordinators (un-paid board members) admitted that they simply thought I was homeless but now believed that I was actually a college-educated volunteer.  Ha!  I didn't mind and ended up continuing to live outside of the volunteer housing, with Liberty and her children (Raven 4 and Sequoia 2) whom I had become very close.  Here they are below on the right during pizza night.  I ended up returning to Eugene two more times while I was on the West Coast to visit Liberty and her children and to help out at the Bosco House.  I spent most of my time there trying to organize fundraisers using the food panty supplies we received -- lots of pumpkin pie baking with the children then trying to sell them after Mass on Sunday (in the middle of August -- ha!).



When I arrived in Seattle, I lived in a hostel for a few weeks until I made some friends who let me sleep on their couch.  I am forever grateful for Tara, Christine and Erin's kindness in allowing me to crash there until I could figure out the city.  I ended up purchasing a small sailboat (Chatauqua, a 27 foot Catalina), which I hauled out to paint the bottom of and then rarely did any maintenance to after that, that I kept at the Shilshole Bay Marina in Ballard near Golden Gardens Park.  A great cheap way to live in Seattle with a beautiful view of the Cascade mountains (and gorgeous daily sunsets). 
It was at this time, at the climbing gym down the street (where I could shower in exchange for teaching climbing classes, since my boat didn't have running water) that I met Joshua.  He has been on this life adventure with me ever since and I couldn't be happier!

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